Ask Harley


Is there such a thing as true love?

Of course there is. However, as I once told Shakespeare, the course of true love never did run smooth.

True love is a wonderful feeling, a feeling you get when you find that special person, the one who intoxicates you by his or her very presence, and sends your thoughts soaring on the wings of a magical dove into the world of wonder, infatuation, and — dare I say it? — marriage.

If true love is real, it means that something inside of you, beyond your control, reaches out and grasps something inside of your loved one. What is that something? It is nothing less than your unconscious self — the embodiment of your parents, your upbringing and your biology.

However, true love communicates on a deep, subverbal level. Day-to-day life is lived above the surface of the water, and the waves can get a bit much at times.

So, no matter how true your love, never forget that you are both human beings who need large, regular doses of understanding, compassion, courtesy, intimacy and fun. Good marriages and long-lasting relationships are not made in heaven; they are made right here on planet Earth, one day at a time.